I read every night, Always the Bible, secondly anything of interest.
Last night I was reading small portions of the book NightLight.
The topic was laughter, the book stated that as children we laugh over 200 times a day!
But as adults only as many as 4 times a day!!!
So being the all wondering person that I am, I went to the bible for reference.
I know "Jesus Wept", But did he ever laugh? Dont know!
Is life so tough that we can't laugh?
So what I'm going to do today is try to make as many people laugh as possible,
And hopefully anyone with a good clean Joke, or a funny experience, will leave it for all to read!!
Love Ya
"Come near and rescue me; redeem me because of my foes". Psalms 69:18
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12 comments:
Here's one to get it going!
The Pope met with the College of Cardinals to discuss a proposal from Shimon Peres, the former leader of Israel. "Your holiness," said one of the Cardinals, "Mr. Peres wants to determine whether Jews or Catholics are superior, by challenging you to a golf match." The Pope was greatly disturbed, as he had never held a golf club in his life.
"Not to worry," said the Cardinal, "we'll call America and talk to Jack Nicklaus. We'll make him a Cardinal, he can play Shimon Peres... We can't lose!" Everyone agreed it was a good idea. The call was made and, of course, Jack was honored and agreed to play.
The day after the match, Nicklaus reported to the Vatican to inform the Pope of his success in the match. "I came in second, your Holiness," said Nicklaus.
"Second?!!" exclaimed the surprised Pope. "You came in second to Shimon Peres?!!"
"No," said Nicklaus, "second to Rabbi Woods."
lol.... :0)
etc... ha, ho, he, hi!
One thing for sure, you can always expect a bad joke to follow a good one..
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves?
What is humor? What is Laughter? What is the meaning of life? How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? How high is up? Why do the people at the drive through always ask me if I want cream or sugar after I have told them to give me a large BLACK coffee? Do pets have people names or do people have pet names? BBT!
I will watch my kids, they do laugh all the time!
Russ,I give up what?
Two guys from Detroit, Michigan die and wake up
in hell. The next day, the devil stops to check on
them and sees them dressed in parkas, mittens
and bomber hats, warming themselves around the
fire.
The devil asks them, "What are you doing? Isn't
it hot enough for you?"
The two guys reply, "Well, you know, we're from
Michigan, the land of ice and snow and cold. We're
just happy for a chance to warm up a bit, you know."
The devil decides that these two aren't miserable
enough and turns up the heat. The next morning,
he stops by again and there they are, still dressed
in their parkas, mittens and hats.
The devil asks them again, "It's awfully hot down here,
can't you guys feel that?"
Again, the guys reply, "Well, like we told you yesterday,
we're from Michigan, the land of ice and snow and cold.
We're just happy to warm up a little bit, you know."
The devil gets a little steamed up and he decides to fix
the two guys. He cranks the heat up as high as it will go.
The people are wailing and screaming everywhere. He
stops by the room with the two guys from Detroit and finds
them in light jackets and hats, grilling sausage and drinking
beer.
The devil is astonished. "Everyone down here is in abject
misery , and you seem to be enjoying yourselves."
The two Michiganders reply, "Well, ya know, we don't
get too much warm weather up there in Detroit, we've just
got to have a cookout when the weather is this nice."
The devil is absolutely furious, he can hardly see straight.
Finally, he comes up with an answer. These two love the
heat because they have been cold all their lives. He
decides to turn all the heat in hell off.
The next morning, the temperature is below zero, icicles
are hanging everywhere, the people are shivering so bad,
they are unable to wail, moan or gnash their teeth.
The devil smiles and heads for the room with the 2
Michiganders. He finds them back in their parkas, mittens
and hats. They are jumping up and down and cheering.
The devil was dumbfounded. "I don't understand. When I
turn the heat up, you're happy. Now it's freezing cold,
and you're happy. What is wrong with you two?"
The Michiganders look at the devil in surprise. "Well,
don't ya know - if hell froze over, that must mean
the Lions won the Super Bowl!"
j...
RUSSELL
I don't get it?
More fun from Calvin and Hobbes:
"You know how Einstein got bad grades as a kid? Well, mine are even worse!"
"That's the difference between me and the rest of the world! Happiness isn't good enough for me! I demand euphoria!"
"My parents are the two stupidist people on earth. Just my luck they'd get married and have me."
"Leave it to a girl to take the fun out of sex discrimination."
An elderly couple had just returned from celebrating their 75th anniversary. They sat down on the front porch and she began to reminisce about their early years when the had begun dating. She said, remember when you first asked me out and you held my hand. He immediately took her hand in his. Remember when we started going steady and you would place your arm around me. And he placed his arm around her. Remember when you proposed to me and then gently kissed me on the cheek. He leaned over and gently kissed her on the cheek. And finally she said, remember when after we married you would nibble on my earlobe. Suddenly the elderly man got up out of the porch swing and went to go inside. Confussed his elderly bride asked what are you doing, the evening was still young surely your not heading for bed. He replied, no I am not heading for bed, you mentioned how early in our datinf I would hold your hand and I took your hand in mine. And then you mentioned how I would place my arm around you and hold you close and I placed my arm around you to hold you close. And you mentioned that after we were engaged I had kissed you on the cheek and I gave you a kiss on the cheek. And then you mentioned that after we had been married I would nibble on yoou earlobe. Yes I remember all that, but why did you need to go inside? I have to go inside to get ..........my teeth.
hardy har har har
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